URL Weaver: @AROD Cometh

New York Yankees v Detroit Tigers - Game Four

A distraction. So much ink will spill over the next few weeks as pundits and hit-and-run columnists pontificate over Alex Rodriguez‘s looming return. Will he serve as a distraction for a team playing over its head? Will the Biogenesis mess allow A-Rod to slip through the Yankees fingers, just as they expected an upgrade on their pathetic third base production in 2013? (Rodriguez fill-ins havae posted a .226/.288/.312 line with 6 home runs in his absence.)

Alex Rodriguez, tone deaf to the very end, decided this was a good time to wade into the twitter world. Perhaps driven by the ceaseless boredom of rehab, Alex Rodriguez grabbed the @AROD (yes, all caps) fired his first 140 character salvo on May 31st with his presence on twitter becoming more commonly understood this week.

Of course, Alex Rodriguez cannot avoid controversy. It surrounds him like a fog at every turn. Every move Rodriguez makes is scrutinized and thin-sliced and boiled to its very (perceived) essence. Twitter probably isn’t a good place for A-Rod, even if he’s only tweeting instagram links of himself…as only A-Rod would.

BUT NOT. Alex Rodriguez cannot build his brand in peace. He must excitedly tweet good news to his 40K and growing set of followers. Alex Rodriguez posts a picture of himself with the Yankees team doctor and claims to be cleared for game action! GOOD NEWS, YANKEES FANS!

But wait.

GM Brian Cashman is NOT having any of your silliness. Cashman told ESPN (via Newsday):

You know what, when the Yankees want to announce something, [we will],” Cashman told ESPN. “Alex should just shut the —- up. That’s it. I’m going to call Alex now.”

OH GOOD. This won’t end poorly at all, will it? Oh right, of course it will.

Make way for the editorializing! Bring out yer unnamed sources, we have some shots to fire, right Bob Klapisch?

But the simmering hostility between Rodriguez and his employers catalyzed the incident into a full-blown confrontation. The Yankees aren’t just annoyed because A-Rod spoke out of turn; they think he’s been stealing money from them since 2009 and beyond, as he’s allegedly been using performance-enhancing drugs.

Put it this way: Derek Jeter would never end up on Twitter, talking about himself. The captain, in fact, is so self-contained he blew off Michael Kay’s request to spend an inning in the YES broadcast booth Sunday.

Jeter, who was at the Stadium over the weekend before returning to Tampa, politely told Kay the booth was for retired players only. It’s as if Jeter was saying: Real Yankees, at least the ones lucky enough to still be on the field, keep it to themselves.

RETIRED YANKEES ONLY! Saint Jeter would never do that! And if he did, well…

Understanding he'd never do it, but if Jeter tweeted elation that doc cleared him to play we'd all hail him as gamer wanting to play, right?

— Joel Sherman (@Joelsherman1) June 26, 2013

Yeah! No! Whatever.

Alex Rodriguez is coming back to the Yankees. Even a crippled version of one of the ten best players of all time is a lot better than what the Yankees have trotted out in his place. Provided he avoids suspension this season, he will help the Yankees win baseball games. Maybe the Yankees need more help than that which Rodriguez provides, but he will certainly make them a better team, not a worse one.

He will only be a distraction as long as the general manager calls out his innocent tweets to the biggest sports news source in the country. He will be a distraction so long as Yankees officials go snitching to the likes of Bob Klapisch. Once he starts playing games, he will no longer be a distraction…unless he doesn’t perform.

Then: Distraction City!

And the rest

AND NOW IT IS THE METS WHO SHALL LOL
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The guy who got “famous” for his twitter account talks about wanting to become famous as a college baseball player. [Grantland]

Awesome: visualizing home run locations. [Beyond the Boxscore]

OF COURSE Ichiro hits a walkoff home run in a game started by Yu Darvish and Hiroki Kuroda. Of course.

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Jose Reyes returns to the Blue Jays lineup today with Munenori Kawasaki bringing his softshoe routine to AAA [DJF]

Domonic Brown Pint Glass tonight for the first 3,000 adults 18+ Gates open at 5:45 #DownTownDomonicBrown pic.twitter.com/oimCP2o8S5

— Lindsey Knupp (@lindseyknupp) June 26, 2013

I would never drink out of a Dom Brown glass as you never know when the enormous hole in the bottom of the glass will show up and you’ll be drenched. HASHTAG TOPICAL HUMOUR.

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